March 8

On the 8th in 1618 legendary big shot thinker Johannes Kepler published his third law of planetary motion: "The squares of the orbital periods of planets are directly proportional to the cubes of the semi-major axis of the orbits". I have absolutely no idea what that means nor do I have a clue about his other two laws on the subject. I think Kepler was very lucky to have his elves to fall back on, because at least his cookies are very good. Oh heck, that was the Keebler elves, not the Kepler elves. I guess Kepler was just another hack that I don’t understand, and without the cookies have absolutely no reason to understand.